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Nicodemus

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Political (Factual) Correctness [Sep. 28th, 2003|10:53 am]
Nicodemus
[Current Mood |buzzed]

I think I've found a solution to our political problem. Like so many things, the answer lies in game shows...

What we need is the Family Feud buzzer! Remember that? The contestant would give a really stupid answer and there would be a big red "X" on the screen?

Dawson: "We surveyed a hundred people and the top answers are on the board. The question was... What is your favorite food?"
Contestant: "Uhhh... Armchair!" X bzzzzt! X

It was simple and perfect seventies technology. Now, we need it again! We need to employ this buzzer during all presidential speeches. Whenever our esteemed president says something incorrect, we'll know. Admit it, this would make you want to actually watch every Bush speech! It would be great:

Dubya: "Well, ya see, we needed to remove Saddam from power because he was developing weapons of mass destruction X bzzzzt! X and he was an evil dictator. Though he's hidden them, we'll find these weapons yet X bzzzt! X with the help of our anti-terrorism allies the Egyptians X bzzzzzt! X. Even as our economy improves X bzzzt! X thanks to my progessive tax cuts X bzzzt! X which are financially sound X bzzzt! X, we'll seek out any dictator or rogue state developing nookular weapons.XXX bzzzzzzzzt! XXX"
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: wabbitcalif
2003-09-28 12:28 pm (UTC)
Not only do I find this a sound idea, I'd like to sign up to employ the buzzer, or have one installed in my home!
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[User Picture]From: dour
2003-09-28 01:35 pm (UTC)
Subtle and profound there, with the lack of buzzer after "evil dictator." :D
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[User Picture]From: nicodemusrat
2003-09-28 03:53 pm (UTC)
Ah, you caught that, did you? :>
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[User Picture]From: dour
2003-09-28 10:55 pm (UTC)
NOTHING ESCAPES ME! Except that damn mosquito.
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[User Picture]From: griffinwolf
2003-09-28 04:02 pm (UTC)
*CRINGES at the word "Nookular"*

I swear that guy is a blackhole for American Intelligence. For the past year I've been catching myself using double negatives, i.e. "I ain't not going to do that."

I just hope he doesn't suck all the intelligence out of us so that we all vote for him again.

I think that buzzer would be nice to use on any news show.. Fox, MSNBC, CNN, Daily show (well, maybe not the daily show... that actually sounds like it would fit on that show, actually).
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[User Picture]From: crocodile
2003-09-28 09:34 pm (UTC)
Of course, you would need closed captioning to make anything out, because the BZZZZZT sound would pretty much overlap every other word.

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[User Picture]From: 3catsjackson
2003-09-28 10:51 pm (UTC)
And just like on Family Feud, he'd be automatically recalled after three buzzers, right? ^_^

Ah hell, I'm feeling magnanimous -- give the man TEN damn buzzers. He still wouldn't last an entire press conference.
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[User Picture]From: happyjenn97
2003-09-29 04:43 pm (UTC)
LOL!

How very true... and very sad...
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[User Picture]From: poetigress
2003-09-29 05:32 am (UTC)

Sounds like a good idea to me...

Read this entry on rain_luong's friends page and think it's a great idea. :) Someone should re-edit one of his recent speeches to include the buzzers... though I agree that you wouldn't be able to hear much of the speech.



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[User Picture]From: musecalliopeia
2003-09-30 02:43 am (UTC)
*LOVED* this. :) Very funny. :) [And I caught the 'evil dictator' thing, too. :) I *was* going to comment on it, then saw that I wouldn't be the first, and was afraid of looking like a doofus. :)]

And I hate the way he mangles the word 'nuclear'. Hell, even Simon Le Bon, lead singer of Duran Duran, said it right in Is There Something I Should Know, 'way back in 1982 or so.
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