July 30th, 2005

Homestar: Cool

Poems Past

I was just in the garage and dug out an old book of mine. It's a generally unremarkable book from the "young adult" or "juvenile fiction" or "whatever they're calling them whippersnappers these days" section called A Semester in the Life of a Garbage Bag by Gordon Korman. (No, really, that's the title.)

Most of the book is rather forgettable. But the gems are the assorted absurd poems. You see, Collapse )

So the upshot is that the book contains a handful poems that are both enchanting and absurdly bad. Which in a way, makes them good, I suppose. Whatever their merits, I have always remembered the dang one about consomme. And now I get to share it with you! :>

Registration Day by Gavin Gunhold (Gordon Korman)
On registration day at taxidermy school,
I distinctly saw the eyes of the stuffed moose

The Bargain by Gavin Gunhold (Gordon Korman)
After the hair tonic salesman's toupee fell off,
He decided to lower the price.
So I bought six cases.
A bargain is a bargain.

Industrial Secret by Gavin Gunhold (Gordon Korman)
The oil companies don't want you to know
That the average car will run on
If you can figure out a way
To get the parsley out of the carburetor.
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